After many summers of speculating, discussing and oftentimes even fighting, “The Summer I Turned Pretty” is coming to an epic conclusion, finally forcing the decision: Conrad or Jeremiah?
For many, the decision has been obvious since before the show aired, having read the books, but there are people who still change their opinion from episode to episode.I have been Team Conrad since I read the books a couple of years ago, and I have stuck to my decision ever since.
However, to me, it was not a contest, not a question of “who is better?” For me, this opinion was based more so on my genuine preference for the older, introverted and more responsible brother.
But things changed. People no longer just prefer a brother; they are rather focused on bashing the other for their behavior, focusing on their mistakes and “terrible personality” rather than their chemistry with the protagonist, Belly.
This discussion poses the question: is Jeremiah just a bad boyfriend, or a bad person?
For starters, he is manipulative towards Belly. He cheated on her. He heavily mistreats his brother. He is selfish. He defends his dad, who is a very questionable character. He hurts the people that he loves.
One might say that he acts immaturely and irresponsibly.
But is that not… realistic? I am not saying it is healthy or right, but are those not flaws that many of us carry too, whether we want to admit them to ourselves or not? Have we not all made mistakes that hurt the ones we loved, maybe on a smaller scale, but nonetheless hurtful?
Conrad was never perfect either.
He spent an entire summer ignoring and mistreating the ones he loved. He dated the girl he knew his brother liked. He spent another summer trying to suppress his feelings for Belly just to then break them to her on the night before her wedding.
The only difference between these actions are their motivations.
Jeremiah was immature and careless, he was grieving, but grew up to be communicative, able to talk about his problems and concerns.
Conrad was trying to take responsibility for his entire family when he was a child and was not able to handle his grief because he grew up to be someone who struggles to communicate.
But whilst that makes Conrad more mature and responsible, it does not make him better.
Maybe it is not the fact that Jeremiah is lacking, but rather that Conrad is exceptionally mature for his age.
But maybe that is not what relationships are about.
Because when Jeremiah cheated, Belly stayed.
Because when Jeremiah had trouble at work, Belly stayed.
Because, in the book, when Jeremiah made his dumb “Beerology” joke, Belly stayed.
It was when she realized that she still loved Conrad that she left Jeremiah.
This love triangle was never about who is the better person, it was about who Belly loved.
The show was not about revealing who could be the most flawed, it was about love.
It was about family, friendship, romantic relationships and the struggles we go through in order to nourish and support them.
But maybe, in the end, it will also be about self love, the relationship we have with ourselves and the realization that the same counts for us.